An Interview with a NICU Nurse about the Family Experience

By Kalyn Warren and Faith Ellis (MS students in Marriage and Family Therapy)

According to a study by March of Dimes, an organization that aims to improve the health of mothers and babies, 14.4% percent of babies in a large national study from 2009–2010 were admitted to a special care nursery, also known as the NICU. This number represents many families who were faced with the frightening experience of their child needing Intensive Care in their first moments and days after being born.

What follows is an interview with Amber, a NICU nurse with 13 years of experience working with babies and families in the NICU. Amber has worked with countless families and loves the work that she does.

I: Thanks so much for talking with me, Amber.
A: Of course.
I: So, to start, can you give me a little information about your history with the NICU?
A: I am a NICU nurse. I work at multiple hospitals in the San Antonio, Texas area. Taking care of these tiny miracles has been my profession and my pleasure for 13 years. As you can imagine, in that time I’ve seen a little bit of everything as far as NICU patients and their families are concerned. A world that is feared by many has become my second home, and my family and friends have graciously labeled me as “the baby whisperer”.
I: Wow, so you have been in this work for a long time. What have you learned is most important to communicate to families beginning their NICU journey?
A: There are a few difficult lessons I have watched families learn, and I have a few nuggets of advice I share with parents during this scary time in their lives. First, know that this time is a tiny blip on your baby’s radar. These days and nights are long, but we will do our best to get you home with your baby by your due date. If you find yourself in the NICU with a preemie, know that they often take two steps forward and one step back.
I: That’s good for parents to know, then, to take it slow as much as they’re able to. What would you say to families whose infants have a medical emergency other than premature delivery?
A: I’d say, if you’ve found yourself with us for surgical or other reasons, know that we will do our best to keep your little one comfortable, the environment quiet, and when permitting, will hold them, in your place, on those days and nights when life calls you away from their bedside.
I: That’s really awesome. NICU staff really treats the babies like their own as much as possible it sounds like. What is the most important thing for families in the NICU to remember? Like, if you could leave us with one reminder?
A: I hope that families always remember that they know their baby best, and if they feel like something is off, or their baby is ready to take a step forward, not to hesitate to ask us, and as a team we can collaborate the best path for their baby. Often times I find I have to remind families to take care of themselves, especially moms as they heal from delivery. Just as your
baby needs rest to grow and heal, you do too. We have the pleasure of caring for these tiny miracles, helping them grow into the perfect baby their families imagined, but when our work is done, parents need to be at their best to continue the love and support they found within our unit.
I: Wow, yeah, it might be hard for new moms and dads to remember to take a breather once in a while. Self-care must be a really important part of becoming a parent, especially under circumstances requiring the NICU. Thanks so much for your time, Amber!

Like Amber said, a baby’s time in the NICU can be experienced as very scary and exhausting for families. It can be helpful to reach out to hospital or supporting staff if you need help with understanding and following medical advice or want to be more involved in the care of your child. It is not uncommon for families to experience higher levels of worry, feeling lonely,
or experiencing post-partum depression. During this time, it may be very helpful for families to know that NICU staff and nurses are on their team and are passionate about caring for their newest little family member! One of the best ways to manage this difficult time is to build a supportive social network and care team to lean on and help connect you to resources. Though it
can be a frightening time, families can rest assured while their baby is in the NICU that caring people like Amber, who are highly specialized, are giving their baby the best possible care.