How to Effectively Support Your Partner with Type 2 Diabetes

By Dylan Hillock, Marriage and Family Master’s Student at Auburn University

If you have a partner with Type 2 diabetes, you have probably wondered how you can best support your partner without adding strain on your relationship. Managing diabetes is no easy task as it often requires lifestyle changes that impact not only the individual with diabetes, but their partner as well. So how do we learn to support our partner’s illness management in a way that also prioritizes mental and emotional well-being? Below is some information and tips on how to provide support that is shown to be the most helpful in managing diabetes, reducing stress, and building satisfaction in your relationship.

Things to Avoid

Protective buffering

Protective buffering refers to hiding your concerns from your partner. This is usually done with good intent in an attempt to protect the person from negative emotions or more stress, but ultimately this can lead to disconnection and high emotions between you and your partner.

Pretending things are fine

Similar to protective buffering, pretending everything is fine and avoiding conflict can cause a rift in the relationship. This lack of acknowledgment can also cause difficulty when attempting to navigate the difficulty of managing diabetes.

Nagging

Chances are, if you have attempted to aid in your partner’s adherence to their treatment plan, you have worried about becoming a nag. Playing the role of an accountability partner can be challenging. The primary thing to remember is to refrain from shaming your partner or taking complete control of the illness management.

Things to Integrate

Knowledge

Having knowledge about diabetes is one of the best ways to provide your partner with effective support. As you probably know, managing diabetes can be complex and overwhelming. Having a deeper understanding of how the illness impacts your partner’s life will allow you to both connect with them emotionally, while also providing practical help in their treatment.

Checking in

Simple check-ins are a great way to show your partner you are supporting them both emotionally and logistically. This is also a great way to avoid nagging. Asking questions like “how are feeling today?” or “is there a specific way I can be helpful for you today?” help you to connect with your partner and support them in a way that does not seem overbearing.

Open communication

This may seem redundant, but open communication is key. This refers to conversations about how you can best support your partner, and the specific level of involvement that your partner wants you to be involved in the management process. This also helps to avoid protective buffering and avoiding conflict. Diabetes can be a stressful experience for both partners. Being open with each other about your experience builds connection and allows for more effective diabetes management.